Dear Gabby,
I am a student at Sinclair Community College and I am currently taking nursing classes. I work at Grandview Hospital as a Nurse’s Aide. I am only 18 and I am very busy. I have horses that I train myself and I am a very independent person, therefore, I like to do a lot of things by myself, but I also enjoy people’s company at times. I am very outgoing and fun to be around, but just like everyone else, I like to have my alone time. My family and friends are important to me also; I love spending time with them and can talk to them about everything, usually. But this time, it’s different.
I am going to need your help. It’s about a boy who I have been best friends with since third grade, so we go way back. We do pretty much everything together, and he is one that I tell everything to and always talk to him about my boy problems, which is very rare. But this time, I can’t talk to him about my boy problems because he is the boy. A few weeks ago, I got my wisdom teeth out, and he came over for three days straight to keep me company. After he left, my mom made a statement about us being more than “best friends.” I told her that we didn’t feel like that; well at least I didn’t anyway. Lately, he has been acting more and more friendly towards me, and I do not see him more than a best friend. So this is where you come in and give me advice. Thank you so much.
Sincerely,
Friend-zoned
This is always a tough situation because usually someone’s heart is bound to get broken or cracked a little. Friendship with the opposite gender seems to always create some problems, especially when someone catches feelings. It’s up to you and what you feel comfortable with.
There’s obviously a chance that it might alter your friendship either way, so I think it’s something that requires some thinking. You could bring it up and be straightforward with him about your feelings toward him, or you could hope that his feelings pass by or that maybe he doesn’t have intimate feelings for you.
If you do choose to talk to him about it, I think it’s important to let him know that you do care for him, but strictly as friends and nothing more. People always want reasons, and if you feel comfortable then let him know why you only see him as a friend. It’s going to be tough, but at least he’ll know your feelings. If you choose to not say anything, it may be easier now because you can try to keep ignoring his hints, but eventually it’ll get tiring for you to have to dodge every move he tries to make to let you know he sees you more than a friend.
I think it’s important to always be open and communicate your feelings, as well as how you view the friendship/relationship. If you guys are really great friends, he should understand where you’re coming from and want the best for you.
Good luck,
Gabby