Dear Gabby,
My sister is crazy. She yells at me all the time over little things. We never get along and we always fight. My parents can’t stand us being in the same room together and it is causing our entire family to argue constantly. My sister has an eight-month-old baby, so it puts more stress on the rest of our family because we have to help her out. Can you give me any advice on how to be civil with my sister and hopefully help save our relationship so there isn’t so much tension within my family?
Sincerely,
Stressed Out Uncle.
Dear Stressed Out Uncle,
Wow, I can imagine why you’re stressed. I think family is really important in general. It’s always good to have a strong family bond because it’s essentially your support system. Plus, I think things tend to become more stressful when you’re not getting along with family.
Many people need to be more compassionate I think with each other—view everyone’s perspective. I think it’s important to empathize with people, especially family members. If you show that you care about someone else’s problems, then they might realize that your problems are just as important.
I think if you both sit down with each other and you sort the problems out effectively and respectfully, then you’ll have a greater chance at bettering the relationship. It seems like both of you are just constantly nit picking, and of course your parents can’t choose favorites, so it’s up to you two to mend the relationship.
You both need to have a common goal—what would be an ideal relationship between both of you, and what would make you both happy and content. Maybe help her out once in awhile by spending time with your nephew/niece, this might show her that you want to help out, but this might also give her time to chill out. Hopefully, she’ll be able to see how much you’re trying to fix the problem between you both.
Also, find time for yourself. Sometimes stress and situations get the best of us. Sometimes all we need is just a break in a quiet place. It sounds like stress could be getting the best of you, so it might be effective if you take time to get out of the house and do something for you. It’s all about finding a balance and working together toward one goal.
Sincerely,
Gabby