Dear Gabby,
This might be long, but I really need your advice on something. I haven’t told anyone—you’re the first person I am telling. This last year has been a whirlwind for me, emotionally, physically and mentally.
Some nights I find myself making nachos and the next night when I am feeling in the mood again, I say to myself ‘Another One.’ Of course, nachos never completely fulfill me, see, I have relationship issues. I want to be with someone but I don’t, because so many people have let me down and I don’t want to get hurt again.
I guess let me start from the beginning: Last year, I was in a relationship that I thought was strictly exclusive. Little did I know, after “catfishing” him at a Comicon convention, he would break up with me a week after my birthday. I had a text from him the day before saying he loved me. Months later, I decided to play my cards with the other gender. But after multiple moments, my insecurities of never finding someone grew. Like I said, I don’t necessarily want to be with someone, but the fact that no one wants to be with me really upsets me. It really ties me in a knot (this is the perfectly good reason why I should be in search of a relationship, right?)
For instance, while taking a nice walk in nature—I love the outdoors—I proceeded to send this girl a photo of the current scenery at the time. Then she sent a photo of a similar view, but in addition, there in the middle of the photo was her boyfriend. I gathered my courage up once more and complimented another girl’s Dayton Dragons lunchbox because I am a huge fan—I like to experience the city I am in fully. Once again, she proceeded to say she had never been to a Dragon’s game and that the lunchbox belonged to her boyfriend. I thought to myself ‘Another One.’
But now, I am finally in a relationship, but I am not sure if it’s the right one. All my friends say I don’t seem happy, and I guess I don’t feel happy either. Let me give you the details. To start it off, he won’t pay any of my meals and won’t let me hang out with the friends I had before—which are not many, so it’s not too much to ask; this is my life, Gabrielle. My parents really like him, but I don’t think they realize how much of a jerk he is.
I’m not the type to expect too much, but it feels like everyone I’ve been with expects more out of me than I expect of them. Even at the end of a relationship, I’ve turned to nachos again. To top this off, I can’t go a day without complaining about work. There are so many unprofessional adults at the institution I work at, who constantly give me a hard time.
So Dear Gabby I have two questions: one personal question about you and one applying to my life. I have heard rumors about you—so tell me off the record—what is it like morphing into a physical deer and saving the city from the darkness that inhabits it from sunset to sunrise? What code of ethics do you go by when you’re ridding the city of crime? For me, I want to try something new, so what type of nachos do you suggest?
Sincerely,
Dissatisfied with the mystery that is love
Dear Dissatisfied with the mystery that is love,
Wow, sounds like an interesting life to say the least. I am glad you’re finding some happiness with your nachos though.
I am sorry to hear about your relationships. The hardest thing about break up, or anything for that matter, is realizing that you’re enough and not beating yourself down emotionally. It’s easier said than done, I know.
It might sound cliche, but when the time is right you’ll find the right life partner if that’s what you want. For some people, being in a relationship is at the top of their list—maybe for you that’s what you feel like—but I think you should try spending some time with yourself, perhaps reading or picking up a hobby of some sort. Doing something you love, creates a better attitude on life; I can say that from personal experience.
Have you ever thought about taking some time away from the complications of life and just relax for bit? It doesn’t get rid of your problems, and certainly running away from problems isn’t the greatest, but sometimes a break from reality is a nice breath of fresh air.
Your personal happiness is important—don’t forget that. I hope you start to make decisions based on what you’d like in life, rather than what someone else wants. Also, trust yourself. Even if people at your work give you a hard time, just focus on accomplishing your goals—don’t get distracted.
As for your questions, how did you know? Oh my, I guess it’s about time that my secret came out. I love helping people. I guess you could call it “ridding the city of crime.” As for the morphing part, it’s pretty cool, and the code of ethics I follow is making sure I have everyone’s best interest at heart—kindness goes a long way.
As for the nachos, you can’t go wrong with some spice and cheese, of course. Get creative, I am sure you could make lots of great nachos. Maybe use your love of nachos to start a food truck? Just throwing an idea out there for you.
Sincerely,
Gabby