Dear Gabby,
I’ve been dating this girl for five months, and I truly think she is the one. I have known her a little over a year, but I also don’t want to feel like I’m rushing things.
She knows how strongly I feel about her, and I am certain she feels the same about me. I’ve been having thoughts about marriage, and honestly, she’s the one I can see myself with for the rest of my life. I don’t want to be without her, which I think is a strong indicator that she’s the one I want to spend my life with.
Do you think it’s too soon to start thinking about marriage and engagement rings? I’m worried that we might not be in the right stage of our lives to think about this, but I also know that she makes me so happy and I don’t want to live without her. We’ve talked about rings before and getting engaged, but I also don’t want to feel like I’m moving too fast. Any advice?
Sincerely,
Next step of love
Dear Next step of love,
I think the foundation of a relationship is most important. Time is something that is really tough because I think it plays an important role in a strong relationship. It’s easy to get caught up in the feelings, which I don’t think is a terrible thing, but I also think its important to build a strong base at the beginning. Five months might seem like a long enough time to know what you want, but personally, I still consider that the beginning.
If you think about it, five months isn’t that long when you’re trying to learn about someone’s whole being and life.
You sound very much in love, which I think is a positive thing—I think it shows that you could be on the right path to creating a life with her. I can’t tell you what is right and wrong—I am still learning myself—but I think as long as you guys are on the same page and are constantly working on sustaining the relationship then I don’t see anything wrong with talking about engagement rings and/or marriage. Personally, I like to keep sight of my future, but keep a close focus on what’s right in front of me.
Sometimes I think we get so bored of our everyday lives that we have to constantly be looking toward taking the next step— what happened to enjoying the moment and bettering ourselves to improve our future? Of course I don’t know the background of your relationship and the details, but there’s time. Don’t feel like you need to rush.
Establish a strong foundation, so that when the road gets tough, you’ll know without a doubt that you’ll still be holding hands through it all. You seem to be going in the right direction with her and are feeling confident that she is the one, so I have no doubt that you both will work.
I just think it’s important to always step back from the situation and observe it yourself. Be honest with each other, voice your fears, expectations and future goals, I guarantee there is always more to learn about each other. Take your time.
Enjoy the road of love,
Gabby